Hurray For Un-lent

As a Calvinist, I follow a very puritan form of moderation in my use of the things of this world. Mine is such a rigid adherence to moderation that I take care to indulge on a regular basis... lest my moderation be extreme, and hence immoderate.

At this time of year especially (we Calvinists disdaining all monkish superstitions) I make it a point to indulge. Here's a list of things I try to do more of at this festive time:

1) smoke more
2) eat more bacon
3) drink more liquor (preferably the good stuff)
4) sleep more (when not partying)
5) eat more chocolate
6) drink more coffee
7) eat more steak

Please join with me in this "however-many-days-we-feel-like-it" period of God honoring pro-tobacco, pro-pig fat, pro-booze, pro-nap, pro-sugar, pro-caffeine, pro-blood indulgence. Don't forget to give thanks!

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